Worst Biker movie EVER?

The Motorcycle Diary

I mentioned some time back, that I intended to put together a review of some biker movies – (I’m now closer to getting that done.), and I think that I have at last managed to, not only scrape the bottom of the barrel, but actually dug right through the bottom of the barrel and scraped somewhere just below it. Yes folks, I think I have found what is quite possibly the worst, most pointless biker movie ever made – (I would however, love to hear from anybody that can prove me wrong.)….. I have yet to watch the whole sordid affair, and have so far only managed to muster the stomach to flick through a few of the DVD chapters… BUT, from what I’ve seen, it’s a doozie!

For a while I thought that Al Adamson’s film ‘Rebel Rousers was pretty poor, but this shone like a halogen spot compared to a recently acquired copy of Satan’s Sadists…… SO, Sadists was for a while the bottom of the pile. Surely NOTHING could oust this from Trash central! – How wrong I was…… Ohhhh so WRONG!

My most recent acquisition is a copy of Russ Myers – ‘Motor Psycho’, which judging from the cover promises a biketastic festival of busty buxom bimbos . Now I haven’t seen the whole film yet, but apart from buxomness aplenty………

Well – You’ll just have to wait for the review!

Nothing - NOT interesting - NOT funny - NOT worth reading today!

The Daily Grind
Well - the weekends nearly here........
Just thought you'd like to know!
I need to do at least some of the following:
1 - Photograph and advertise our broken car.
2 - Photograph and advertise another motorbike
3 - Sell some records
but most importantly - NOT BUY ANYTHING!!!!!!

I got thrown into a bit of a flat spin yesterday - No need for details! - As a result I sank into a bit of a depression and ended up buying things I don't really need!

Obsessional behaviour and wet floors!

My Current Obsession
My musical obsession has just taken a sudden slight detour – After seeing the Eddie Curtis track on the ‘Number One Songs From Heaven’ blog, I realized that it was VERY important for me to know what year all my records came out – (So I will be listing the years on my record sleeves) - Just don’t ask OK!!!!!! – It’s just the way my obsession works.

SO – last night, I’m up with a stack of singles writing names, titles, labels and matrix numbers feverously on sheets of paper so that I can cross reference them today – I still haven’t found a date for the Josie 45, that started all this, as I don’t have any Josie singles – (except for some early cuts by the Cadillacs).

I’ve done my SMASH singles, BUNKY, AMY, and WAND – Drew a blank on dates for Sceptre!!! – (Which surprised me.), BIG TOP, VERVE and SPAR all came together OK – (PS, quite a few of these labels I only have 1 or 2 records on, so it doesn’t take too long to find the info I need, if it’s around.)
- - - NOW – Isn’t all this interesting! - - -

Anybody know anything about Tay-Ster records? – The Anglos on ORBIT – (Incense.), the Whispers on Soul Clock?

Tonight, I will hopefully go to bed before the morning, and be allowed to wake up sometime after the crack of dawn! – I’m not in a particularly humorous mood today – not helped by the fact that I managed to soak our kitchen floor again – Long story, but basically, we are waiting to have a new floor fitted due to a leak. The new floor can’t be fitted until readings have been taken to say that the drying machines – (which have now been in for several weeks – possibly months?) have finished doing their job, and the floor and wall are now moisture free.. A situation not helped by me causing another minor flood! – I wasn’t very popular this morning!

Make that Double A HAT-TRICK

Music All images & audio clips removed

I must get round to creating links to some of the other music orientated sites that have excited and inspired me - (You bastards!You've also fuelled my addiction to old records and caused me to either spend more than I can afford, or in the case of the Howard Peters single, sweat blood over the fact that I found a copy but can't afford to buy it at the moment!!!!!)

Anyway - I hope I didn't offend anybody with that little outburst - but if I did - TOUGH!

Today, I was inspired by hearing a couple of Jimmy Holliday tracks on The Number One Songs In Heaven blog - So my reply is another Jimmy Holliday track called The New Breed from the Diplomacy label - As always, I know nothng else about it, or the label. Would appreciate comments, but if, like me you know nothing more about it, just sit back and enjoy!

Cover Versions

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Today I'm going to post a couple of cover versions, which I think dispel the assumption that covers are never as good as the original. First up is a killer version of Bob & Earl's - 'Harlem Shuffle' - SACRILAGE I hear you shout!
But this one is not taken at the usual steady beat - This is made especially for amphetimne fuelled dancers. It comes from the Sceptre Label and is done by The Traits.

My second offering comes from the Vontastics, and is another uptempo dancer - this time a cover of The Beatles - Day Tripper.

No ideas on years on either of these - so any info you may have on either track would be welcome. - Enjoy!

A SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS

The Daily Grind

Well – That was fun…….

I have not written for a while – mainly because I’ve had nothing much to say – No news, nothing new.

Today is different!

Chapter 1 – Jaysters Series of Unfortunate Events

On Wednesday, a fairly normal day suddenly changed into pandemonium – At about 3.30 I was asked to take the works van from our offices to our warehouse, another colleague would follow in a car and bring me back. The round trip should bring us back to the offices by spot on five, provided we didn’t hang about, or get caught in traffic – (believe it or not, the trip went smoothly, and we made it back, as expected at spot on five. Grabbed my bits and bobs, jumped on my bike and started the cycle trip back to my car – Everything is going well. Until that is, I reach my car, only to discover I don’t have any keys. Not too big a problem, although I will be late home, I just have to cycle back up to work, pop in, get my keys, make a quick phone call home to explain that I will be a few minutes late, then back on my bike again – So that is what I did –well, up to a point. The plan was once more changed by the fact that nobody else was left at work – Locked up, shut down, nobody will be back in till tomorrow.

OK, things are now looking a tad bleaker, but there’s still hope! – cycle back to where my car is parked, and visit another work colleague who lives ‘somewhere’ on the estate where my car is parked – (Anybody notice a potential problem in that line?) – I don’t know exactly where he lives, but have a rough idea, and know that he put a new fence up a few months ago – I asked a few people that I saw walking about, to no avail, then spotted a potential house – knocked on the door and it was answered – But not by Mr X! – “Any idea where Mr X lives please?” – I’m in luck, as the man points next door and says “Next-door” – Well, how’s that for a spot of good luck? – Luck would have been better had they been in, but unfortunately I’d missed them by about 5 minutes, and they had just popped into town – SO, I tried the neighbour again, to see if there was any chance of borrowing a phone, I explained the problem to him, he lent me a phone, and I phoned the wife and explained it to her. This is going to cause a problem, and I’m sure that I’m in trouble – OK – She will phone her work, arrange a baby-sitter for the boys and come out to collect me. She doesn’t know the housing estate, so I have to cycle back up to the offices and wait outside for her – She should be here in about 40 minutes? – Unless she goes to work then pick me up after work to teach me not to be such a pea brained, dunderhead. – so I sit down, read a bit, write a bit, listen to a bit of music on my MP3 player, until the battery runs out – Can’t read any more or write, because it’s getting dark – So I sit, then stand, then sit again –(Till my bum and balls go numb), then stand again, and move about, trying to ignore the pins and needles. THEN, things take another bizarre twist, I see my folks car go past – (Odd, because they live 30 miles away in the opposite direction form our house) – so I get up to have a look. Nobody about, perhaps I was mistaken, but no – they come back again…….

“Hello Jerry” – “Hello mum! – what’s going on?” – Well it turns out that Mrs Jayster had also had a series of unfortunate events!

Chapter 2 – Mrs Jaysters Series Of Unfortunate Events

Mrs Jayster has only come to my offices a couple of times, and every time I have been with her, so she’s never had to find them on her own, so she got a tiny bit lost…. That in itself would not have been a huge problem, as she would have been able to ask somebody, and eventually get directions to our estate and find me. No, the main problem was the fact that the car decided, it no longer liked oil or water, and therefore opened up a hole in the engine to let both out all of a sudden. Then it changed it’s mind – (fickle things these engines.). It decided it DID need oil and water after all, so the engine made some unpleasant noises and stopped! – Shame, because the car is brilliant otherwise, excellent bodywork, interior, gearbox etc. It just has a very dead engine! – She hadn’t been able to arrange a baby sitter, so the boys are in the car with her. Stuck at the side of the road, lost and all, as you would expect, tired, bored and getting a little irritated. Fortunatley, a very nice lady stopped to see if they needed any help, and left a nice bag of toffee’s, which did a great job of keeping the two boys happy! – A breakdown man came and looked at the car, got it started, turned it off again and said – Ohh Dear! – then arranged for a recovery truck to come and tow it home.. – (Meanwhle – back in the jungle….)

By this time, my mum, dad and myself, had worked out where Mrs Jayster and the boys were, and had driven to find them – All together at last, all in reasonable humour considering the currently worsening situation…… and believe me it IS worsening!!!!

The breakdown truck is taking a very long time to arrive, especially considering that when arranged it had been noted that it was to assist a lady driving with two small children. This situation would normally be given priority. It transpires that breakdown trucks are named for a reason, and not as I always suspected, because they collect broken down cars, the one that was coming to collect my wife had indeed broken down! – A second truck was arranged and eventually arrived. – the driver must have been in a bit of a rush, as he barely gave me time to take the child seats out of the car, as he was hauling it up on the winch – in fact, I nearly got pulled under the car, and tripped on the edge of the flatbed, in my attempt to remove the second one! – he relented, and gave me a moment or two to actually get it out, so that the children could be safely strapped into the seats in the lorry.

At last, we’re on our way home, my mum and dad followed us the fifteen miles back to our house, to make sure all went well, and to help with the children once we got home – the plan being to give me a lift back to their house, and then another lift into work the next day. – It was at this point that we remembered that there is a spare key for my car, so they gave me a lift back to that instead, and I was able to drive back to my house – eventually arriving back somewhere between 10.30 and 11pm.

Phew – Now we have to work out what to do with the current car situation!

Just 1 left!

Thought For The Day
Now here is quite a dilemma – This morning There was NOTHING to put on toast, the cereal had almost run out, so the boys had a bowl each, and I had what was left, which amounted to about half a bowl, most of which consisted of dust and the slightly stale bits that inhabit the outer box, instead of the internal “Keep the contents fresh” bag. As a result, I’m hungry!

So - What (you may ask) is the dilemma?

For the answer see my post from the other day - SLIGHTLY HORRIBLE!

a forced spring clean.

The Daily Grind
Well, the online storage facility where I keep my images and MP3 files went tit's up yesterday - As a result I have had to re-stock the file bucket, and will have to edit my previous posts, if I want the images to re-appear with the tracks... chances are I won't bother, but I might just go in and remove them . I did say they were there for a limited time only!

On set with The Borrowers

The Daily Grind

Now here’s a rather dull story for you all to enjoy. I was in the film ‘The Borrowers’, although may well have been cut out due to my own stupidty. – I worked as an extra for a couple of years – Well, you know how it goes? – I needed a little EXTRA money, it seemed the ideal way of getting it! – I worked for the Ray Knight Agency who got me far more work than any of the other agencies that I paid to be with!!!!! - Anyway – I digress.
SO, we’re called to a location near Reading (Theale if you must know) to shoot a couple of scenes for the Borrowers, at the time I had a beard, and being as I was just an extra, that was fine. I was given a bicycle to ride, then told off for swapping it for a smaller bike, as that was the one the main star was supposed to be riding – hence the little tin can on the front which he was carying a couple of borrowers in - Ooops, there I go on another tangent. filming went well, and my job for the day was wearing a hat and an overcoat and riding up and down the road on the bicycle. Then we were called up to another location in central London, where I was once more given a hat and an overcoat and a bicycle to ride about on – (If I remember rightly the boy was cycling to a dairy or something, there was a bridge / tunnel at both locations, and the idea was that one location was one side of the bridge and the other location was the other side.) Trouble is the boy must have been cycling for about a month and a half under the bridge, by which time I’d realised that the beard was more trouble than it was worth. It felt like I had a scarf on the whole time, it also managed to retain odours from previous nights exploits, even after serious cleaning – (I won’t go into details, but I’m sure you know where I’m coming from.) – As a result, it had to go! – I don’t think I actually appear cycling in the film either clean shaven, or bearded!

Scrappy dappy scrapped!

Thought For The Day
Going back to one of my previous posts - SOUL SHAKEDOWN. I wrote a brief comment about sacking Scrappy Doo. Well it appears that he has indeed been given the push – (we got a free DVD with a couple of ALL NEW Scooby Doo episodes in a packet of cereal.) – And there is no sign of Scrappy.

SO – If anybody can offer work to an annoying cartoon puppy, please write to Hanna Barbera. Hurry though, because if like so many other young actors that get unceremoniously dumped from their shows, he gets depressed he is likely to turn to drugs / drink and ultimately take a soul crushing job as a security guard in a supermarket or something.

SLIGHTLY HORRIBLE

The Daily Grind

You Are 63% Weird

You're so weird, you think you're bordering on normal. Right? But you wig out even the hairiest of estate agents!

How Weird Are You?

Picked this up from GW – and found I was 60% weird. Tried one of his other tests too . . . But really didn’t like the result. How can I EVER afford to pay that much of a fine – especially given that I’d be spending the rest of my natural life (Plus a fair amount more once I’d passed away)behind bars!

But that’s an aside. Today’s post is ‘
SLIGHTLY HORRIBLE

A work colleague has just come back from a trip to China, and as tradition dictates, brought a few munchable morsels for the rest of us to ‘enjoy - Now I am known as the company dustbin, and am quite happy to chomp my way through any food offerings – This is on the proviso that the offerings are indeed advertised as at least moderately edible. I mean I don’t go eating staples, pencils, CDs or battery chargers that are left in my desk area – but most other things are fair game. There were two varieties brought in from China – One was a packet of TEA biscuits, and although nobody else seems to like them much, I’ve managed to plough my way through quite a few of them, and they do taste like a very pleasant cup of tea – but in biscuit form. All I need now is a digestive flavoured drink to dunk them in. The other thing is a pack of fairly large sesame covered cakes – The packet only contained 4, and although they have been there for the best part of a week, there are still 2 left – (Yes – Of course I’ve eaten one – That was a rather obvious question you just thought wasn’t it?). – I’m very tempted to eat another one, even though the taste is ever so slightly horrible. Not horrible enough to put you off eating it all together, like eating bread with mold on, rotten peanuts, or sour lumpy milk – all of which I find quite unpalatable.
Just a little offputting is the smell that these cakes emit. They look perfectly cooked, lovely light coloured sesame seeds on a golden pastry that looks like the top of a McDonalds Bap, but they smell a little overcooked – (Read that as Burnt…..and then cooked some more.) – However, it’s not a ‘normal’ burnt, more like they have been burnt on a bonfire, rather than in an oven. The smell is not over-powering, but you don’t need to put your nose right up to it to get a whiff, it seems to permeate the surrounding area with a hint of it’s smoky delight.

I’ve got your mouth watering now…..right?

And we haven’t even bitten into it yet. – OK. First bite, and we’re treated to sesame covered pastry, unsweetened, …Now here’s a mystery, the blandness of the pastry, seems to completely over power any flavour the sesame seeds should have, leaving you with little taste, but a texture that fills the mouth with a very claggy, seedy sensation. You also get the first glimpse of the filling, a thick dark substance that looks a bit like processed dates with pine kernels stuck in it… It also looks like other things which may be found littering the woodland floor, but I won’t go into that for fear that some of you may be enjoying a real biscuit with your afternoon tea. Eating this is a most bizarre sensation. You’ve heard of bitter sweet? – Well this is it, theres certainly something sweet in there, sugars or syrups or nectar or something, but there’s also some bitter flavourings, there is a slight hint in both flavour and texture of bonfire ash, and there’s also the merest hint of something you might find on a well matured compost heap – I can’t even start to describe that – Even though I’ve taken several bites and tried ever so hard to describe it to myself. I think the sweetness of it is the only thing that draws it into the category of slightly edible. As for aftertaste – the sweetness disappears, leaving you with a bitter ash flavour. Perhaps that’s what entices you to have another bite, as it’s not quite so bad while it’s still in your mouth.

ONLY 1 LEFT NOW….. I wonder who will eat it?

I think I need a cup of coffee – I’ve also got a slight stomach ache now……Ooops – and wind!

The POPULAR 5 on MINIT

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Well – I haven’t got much to say today – Soul do at Greenham was pretty good. Although the music was a little predicatable., you know, all the stuff you’ve got on the ‘Best Of …. Soul LP’s’ – Did plenty of dancing, but didn’t hear anything that made me go “WOW, I’ve never heard this before.” – Didn’t sell any records, but then I really didn’t try.

I asked the DJ for Jackie Wilson’s – ‘Baby Workout’ – He didn’t have it, but said he could play Higher and Higher, or Sweetest Feeling instead. Now Workout is no rarity, so I’m not asking too much am I? –OK the other 2 tracks are good, but you pick up any old CD, with a sniff of Jackie Wilson, and that’s what you’ll find – Why even if you just collect the free CD’s given away with the daily papers you’ve probably managed to snag both of these tracks at least once – But Hey Ho…….. AND another thing – while I’m on a roll. WHY do DJ’s play from these silly mixed compilations – where one track runs into the next, so you either end up with a clipped short track, or – (EVEN WORSE) A brief snippet from the start of the next track. OK – use these CD’s as a reference point, if you want to hear a load of music, but if there is stuff you want – FOR GOD SAKE either find a real copy of it on single, or at the very least get it on a CD where there is a gap between tracks. I’m not one of the se stuffed shirts that thinks you should ONLY play original 45’s, but I am a bit of a stickler when it comes to using ready mix CDs………..AND……..Who the HELL Plays medley’s? – MEDLEY’S???? – What’s the point in that eh? – You get halfway through a track you really like, dancing round like a dervish only to be cut short, in mid stride with admittedly another great track, but it really hacks me off……and relax!!!!

Today’s track is on the Minit Label – I did try and ask about it on another Blog – But the link didn’t work. SO – Any ideas? -



Incidentally, the flip side is a great soul mover version of Thurston Harris – Little Bitty Pretty One – (Or should that be Bobby Day?)